Building the A-team during the zombie apocalypse is crucial to survival. We’ve listed the absolute best celebrities you should be joining forces with when the going gets tough and undead get going.
Zombie apocalypses can be so darn unpredictable! All that stuff you see on Walking Dead, that’s nothing compared to a real zombie apocalypse. For the real thing, you need a celeb that really knows how to handle themselves in a life-or-death situation. For effective butt-kicking, Woody Harrelson’s got a stellar zombie slaying resume via his turn in Zombieland. For survival, Bear Grylls knows how to use a sheep corpse as a sleeping bag (comes in handy!). Quick emergency getaway? Harrison Ford’s got you covered, as he knows how to fly a helicopter. This list is chock full of celebs who would be ideal warriors to join you in your quest for survival as zombies come and TRY to take over our precious Mother Earth. Bring it, Zombies!
These celebrities will cover all of your bases and then some, keeping you safe, happy, and healthy after the destruction of mankind and our world as we know it. Vote up the celebrity you’d most want to team up with during a zombie apocalypse.
1. Bear Grylls
The star and host of “Man vs. Wild,” Bear Grylls will know all of the best survival techniques when you’re out on the road or scavenging for food. He even knows how to use a sheep corpse as a sleeping bag or flotation device! He’s climbed Mount Everest and could probably take you there to safety when the zombies come a-running. You’ll most likely be hard pressed to find many up there.
2. Woody Harrelson
Harrelson co-starred in Zombieland as Tennessee, a lover of killing zombies, so he is already well-versed in proper zombie etiquette and survival tactics. Plus, he’s a vegan and raw foodie in real life, so his morals will prevent him from ever turning his gun on you.
3. Chuck Norris
Having a 10th degree black belt in Chun Kuk Do, 9th degree black belt in Tang Soo Do, 8th degree blackbelt in Taekwondo, and holding black belts in both Judo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, Chuck Norris can kick and punch those zombies away faster than most people could pull the trigger of a gun. While you’re running away in fright, he’ll be battling zombies until each one has had a thorough kick to the face. Hi-ya, zombie!
To prepare for her role in The Hunger Games as Katniss Everdeen, Lawrence had to get in shape by learning how to shoot a bow, climbing rocks and trees, going through combat training, and taking up parkour. This well-rounded badass is the perfect person to keep at your side at all times.
Danai Gurira, of “The Walking Dead,” is the ultimate badass. Wielding a samurai sword in the show, Gurira has absolutely no fear of zombies, and even uses them to carry her things and protect her while she roams through crowds of death walkers.
Samuel L. Jackson
Not only is Jackson known for taking on badass roles in movies, but he’s also a badass in real life. He was a member of the Black Panthers back in the 1960’s, making him a no-nonsense guy. He’ll keep the whole group in line when despair starts to eat away at everyone else, including you.
Being in the ultimate zombie show of all time, “The Walking Dead,” Cohan already knows a thing or two about being in the most intense situations in the zombie apocalypse. She’s had to face some of the most gruesome and disgusting walkers while filming, so her tolerance for the real life walkers will be pretty high.
Geena Davis was a semi-finalist for the U.S. Olympic archery team in 1999. This woman has a serious license to kill and can keep zombies at bay, ensuring your safety at all times.
Natalie Portman is super smart. She attended Harvard University where she studied neuroscience and even published a paper. You never know when she could discover a cure to apocalypse, or at least keep you from turning into a zombie if you’ve been infected.
There’s one key word to know when talking about why you need Harrison Ford on your team: helicopter. He can pilot that baby just about anywhere, giving you a reprieve from the zombie army coming your way. Plus, he’s been known to volunteer his helicopter to the police, so he likes helping out other people.
Doctors are essential to have around to help the sick and injured. Enter Ken Jeong. Break a bone? Dr. Jeong will be there. Coming down with a serious illness? Dr. Jeong will be there. He’s the ultimate celebrity doctor to tend to your every zombie wound.
One of the masters at developing character, Daniel Day-Lewis goes to the extreme to find his character in each film. To prepare for his role in Gangs of New York, Lewis worked in a real butcher shop. He spent much of his time off camera sharpening knives, which he learned to throw with great accuracy. Note to self: Stay close to this guy when oncoming zombie requires a quick and speedy knife to the brain.
Surprised to see Martha Stewart on this list? Well, don’t be, because she’s going to be your best friend when you find sanctuary on her 153 acre farm in Bedford, NY, complete with cows, bees, chickens, an extensive vegetable garden, fruit trees, and more berries than you could ever eat. She also has a large house, a guest house, and a tenant house all on the property to host you and your entire family. And she’ll leave a mint on every single one of your pillows.
While she may seem like an unlikely celebrity to team up with, Julia Roberts lives on a ranch in the small town of Taos, New Mexico. Not only would the mountainous village be low on zombies (especially during their often freezing winters) but her large property could be used as a safe haven as well as a place to farm crops. and, ya know, she’s hot.